Endurance and resilience are both valuable skills, but when applied inappropriately, they can do more harm than good. It’s essential to recognize when endurance is the right response to a situation and when resilience is the better approach. Understanding the difference is crucial to preventing burnout and maintaining overall well-being.

DEFINITIONS:

1. Resilience: According to the American Psychology Association, APA, resilience is the process and outcome of successfully adapting to difficult or challenging life experiences, especially through mental, emotional, and behavioral flexibility and adjustment to external and internal demands. Resilience is the ability to recover, adapt, and grow stronger after facing adversity, challenges, or setbacks.

Adapting: to change, or to change something, to suit different conditions or uses: adapt something.

Behavioral Flexibility: the ability to shift response patterns (or strategies) after changes in environmental conditions.

• Involves flexibility and the capacity to adjust strategies or perspectives.

• Resilient individuals use adversity as an opportunity for growth.

• Emphasizes learning, emotional regulation, and long-term sustainability.

It’s about bouncing back and adapting to maintain or regain strength after difficulty.

Example: After losing a job, a resilient person processes their emotions, re-evaluates their goals, and actively seeks new opportunities.

2. Endurance is the ability to withstand or persist through difficulty, stress, or hardship without necessarily changing or adapting.

Withstand: remain undamaged or unaffected by.

Persist: continue firmly or obstinately in an opinion or a course of action in spite of difficulty, opposition, or failure.

• Involves persistence and grit, often without immediate relief or recovery.

• Focused on survival rather than transformation.

• Can lead to burnout if sustained for too long without recovery.

It’s about holding on and pushing through despite challenges.

Example: Continuing to work at an unfulfilling job for years despite the stress, simply to make ends meet.

The difference between resilience and endurance is that resilience is adaptive, involving thriving after hardship and finding ways to grow stronger, while endurance is static, focusing on surviving hardship without necessarily changing or improving the situation. Resilience helps you transform through challenges, while endurance helps you persist despite them.

Both are valuable but serve different purposes. Cultivating resilience can help endurance be less draining and more meaningful.

However, when we normalize harmful thinking and behavior, we may convince ourselves that enduring difficult situations is noble or the “right” thing to do. This mindset can limit our ability to problem-solve, consider other options, or set necessary boundaries. It’s crucial to understand that not every challenge is meant to be endured without change. As we approach the holidays—a time when feelings of overwhelm and burnout can intensify—this understanding becomes even more vital.

Keys to Building Resilience:

1. Reflect
Self-awareness is the foundation of resilience. Take time to be honest with yourself about your psychological and emotional limits. This awareness can help you identify where your boundaries need to be set. Remember, sacrificing your well-being to appear noble often has the opposite effect—it diminishes your ability to show up fully for yourself and those around you. Commit to honoring your limits as a form of self-respect and care for others.

2. Acknowledge Difficult Emotions
Difficult emotions need space to be processed. Write down your thoughts and feelings in a journal or share them with someone you trust. This practice can help you uncover the needs and boundaries that are essential for your well-being. Processing your emotions also clarifies the thinking patterns that may need to shift.

3. Identify What You Can and Cannot Control
Resilience grows when you accept what’s beyond your control and focus your energy on what you can influence. Letting go of uncontrollable factors lightens your emotional load, allowing you to redirect your attention to areas where you can make a meaningful difference.

4. Communicate Boundaries with Love
Boundaries are most effective when set proactively and communicated with care. Waiting until you’re overwhelmed often leads to reactive, anger-driven boundaries that may not endure. Instead, set consistent boundaries from a place of self-respect and love. Boundaries are not about caring less; they’re about protecting your ability to care sustainably. By preserving your emotional capacity, you ensure that you can continue supporting others without compromising your own well-being.

5. Prioritize Self-Care
True self-care goes beyond temporary gratification. While indulgences like shopping or comfort foods may offer short-term relief, they are not substitutes for actions that nurture your overall well-being. Focus on activities that replenish your mind, body, and spirit, such as exercise, therapy, prayer or meditation, walking in nature, reading or watching uplifting content, and spending quality time with loved ones. Self-care is a commitment to your health and balance, enabling you to be your best self.

Both endurance and resilience play vital roles in life, but knowing when to apply each is essential for maintaining balance and well-being. Endurance helps us persevere through challenges, while resilience empowers us to adapt, grow, and recover. By recognizing the difference and responding thoughtfully, we can safeguard our mental and emotional health, avoid burnout, navigate life’s difficulties with strength and purpose....and be our best selves for others. You got this!

-Dr. Jennie

I would love to hear your thoughts, ideas, or questions. Please feel free to drop those in the comments section below. Let’s talk!

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